Honesty, or the lack of such

Most of us have had a situation in our lives once or twice or multiple times where honesty is a hard thing to obtain. Whether it be in social life, work life or even love life, honesty seems to stray away or was never there to begin with. But why? What causes this, especially when there was honesty in the first place?
Is it fear of a potential action or potential embarrassment? Is it fear of consequence or judgment? Or has the morals been lost somewhere along the way?
These are all questions that have no true answer because if you can't obtain honesty before the questions, you won't obtain an honest answer.
I really dislike it when I'm treated like an idiot. It really gets to me when people can't just spit out the truth when you know they are holding something back for whatever reason it is. Or when you catch them in a lie and they still keep up with the bush beating. Why people can't be up front and honest is beyond me but trying to understand what some people do is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'll just get used to being treated like an idiot by some people while continuing to excel to show other people I'm worth more than they originally believe. I deserve a chance to show I can correct my mistakes just like the rest of us, assuming that we show the initiative. We all deserve honesty because if we're not honest with each other, we won't know our true faults. But this is not a perfect world.
Some of us hide the truth because we're ashamed of the choices we've made. Others guide the truth because they're afraid they will hurt the ones that had "meant" so much to them at one point. Regardless, we have conformed into a society ruled by fear. We allow our conscious minds to take the wheel and cause war.
This is something I will not stand for anymore.
As one, finally being in touch with my higher mind, I will continue to provide honesty. I will continue to not be ashamed of my past and let it hold me back. I will continue to not assume what others are thinking and/or doing. As human, I have questions but not all questions need an answer and that is the most important aspect we need to accept in life to achieve success. Only put forth energy towards the questions with answers that can be obtained.
If you can't be honest with others, you can't be honest with yourself. If you can't be honest with yourself, you can't obtain your goal. If you can't obtain your goal, what are you doing? If you don't know what you're doing, then your considered a waste and if you're considered a waste, your life must be reassessed if you want it to change.
This is my shpeel for the night. No edits or review. Just the raw thought process. Pay attention or don't. You have the choice. Whether you make the right choice, it's a decision only you can make.

Brought to you by Nike. Just do it

Anger

So I tried to write all my problems out as I was told to do. You would think it would be easier if I wasn't drunk but in fact, it wasn't.
I do not have a drinking problem, squashing that thought right now.  My friends noticed I am going through some mental shit and decided to help out.  So yes, I am drunk right now and going back to the original topic, my thoughts are scrambled.  With or without and it doesn't take a psych to tell you.
Anger classes seem to be a dead end, they tell me I don't have a problem but instead, select people around don't know how to handle real life as a real person.  Ya, that helps me, thanks for the 3rd party degradation.  Everyone is always trying to place blame on someone else, even when you yourself is placing blame on yourself, someone has to tell you that you're wrong.  This is ridiculous.
So here I am, angry because I'm being told I'm not angry and the anger rises more because of how lost I feel inside. Some of my friends see the look I accidentally show from time to time but most just see the mask, as it should be.
If you don't know what has been going on for the past...... 3 weeks then you should really just stop reading and continue with your daily routine.
This is not a poor pitiful me post, this is using my only outlet that doesn't argue back. (the keybaord, haha)
I am not one to drag a reputation in the mudd besides my own nor would I ever and to keep most detail out provides much confusion to those who may or may not know what I'm talking to.  But typing this out on a keyboard that doesn't argue back is the best of ways for me to get out what I need to get out.
Yes, I am trying to maintain.  No, I am not depressed or doing drugs.  No, I do not have a drinking problem and yes, I miss her so much but refuse to make the same mistakes I did before.
Mentally, I am not ok but you wouldn't know that.  I have some great friends and a great brother who have been doing their best to keep my mind occupied on other things.  For the most part, it helps but then I try to sleep and my mind won't stop thinking about one thing in particular.  At this point, I have slept 104 out of 504 hours and that's only because my body finally just shuts down.  Somehow, this does not effect my drive.
I am determined to prove to anyone that thinks I'm nothing wrong.  I've done it before and I'll do it again and again and again and again.
So where did the problems occur?  I took a break for mental stability at the wrong time in an unexpected way without warning or thought of caring otherwise.  I needed this break that was all for nothing in the end.  Why would I just take a break from life? You should already know if you're close enough but if not, let me explain.
Since 2007, I have been the sole provider of my house taking care of my mother who is dying slowly.  This woman will live for many years to come because of how stubborn she is but still dying none the less.  I had to drop out of school so I could work more and really, I've been working ever since.  Taking on responsibilities I shouldn't have too soon.
My life=sacrifice.
No, I'm done.  Not anymore.  I lost the most important aspect of my life and now I have had it.
Am I angry?  Hell yes I am.  Do I have the right to be?  Hell yes, I do.  Do I know what I'm angry about? More or less but no, not really.  I still haven't figured out much and it probably has a lot to do with the sleeping issues but I am determined.  I want a life without sacrifice and I will have it.  I'll never get back what I lost and that is why I am so driven.
So yes, I have issues.  But we all do. Some worse than others but issues, none the less.
Again, I am drunk but I do not have a drinking problem.  Last night was my friday and this situation was brought up in conversation. I was left to think about it AGAIN so to keep my mind occupied, I wrote it down.  Sure beats cutting my arms up or smoking crack...

A Facebook Public Service Announcement

If Mark had known that Facebook would be used by people to post their drama instead of accomplishments, he probably wouldn't have made Facebook to begin with. That or he would have put something in the Terms and Conditions that made it not allowed.
This is why the internet sucks IMHO. People took something great and turned it into a sewer of crap! There's a place for all this drama. There really is. It's called High School.
It's one thing to post about someones/your health conditions or a passing, but it's a completely different thing to post your daily drama (rather it be relationship issues, weight problems, depression, anger, etc.) for the world to see.
Ok I get it, you want your friends opinion. But not all your friends want to read that crap. This is why social networks are our society's downfall. Instead of talking to our friends face to face, we have now put a computer in the middle and added every friend we have. It's gross and makes some of our friends begin to not like us cause in their eyes, our life is nothing but drama.
I may not have very much room to speak about posting drama on Facebook or anywhere else on the internet because let's face it, this post in a whole is a problem I'm posting. The point I'm getting at here is STOP with your drama, people. You may have a select few friends that get off on your drama filled life but the rest of the world graduated from High School a long time ago and would like to never go back.

Brought to you by your local Smoke House, where the role of oppression is in reverse!

  

A False Sense of Entitlement in This Economy Pisses Anyone Off...

  So here I am, struggling to make ends meet every day.  This is a very common venture with many of us at this point in time.  Ya, I have an addiction to material possessions but this has nothing to do with me.  This topic is about the trust fund kids and young adults that can't fend for themselves out in this mad world.

  What am I so pissed off about?  Well, a lot.  More importantly, what just happened today.  Something on a small scale made me discover something on a larger spectrum of things.  The example I'm about to give will most likely make the majority of you readers will wonder why I'm so agitated with something so small.  It's because it's not that small to me when it get's thrown in my face.

  See, it all starts back in September of last year.  I had been saving up for this new phone.  $532.67 was the total.  I paid full price cause the plan I have didn't offer an upgrade and I actually needed a new phone.  I wasn't going to settle with something either.  If I was going to buy a phone with my hard earned money, I might as well buy something I actually want.  I digress...

  As soon as I got this phone, a friend of mine just HAD to have one.  No job, living with her parents, she gets exactly what she wants the very next day for $200 less then what I paid.  I wasn't pissed that she paid less than me, I was pissed that she had her parents buy it when she wanted it.  No waiting required.

  Now this is a very nice phone.  One I can hold on to for at least 3 years.  There is really no need to upgrade to anything else.  I can spend my money on something I actually need to spend my money on.  Like... BILLS!  

  What happened today?  Apparently she wanted help setting up her brand new phone!  She has a plan that allows her to upgrade but it's August.  She got that phone in October of last year.  No upgrade available at this time.  So it was full price, but did she pay it?  I don't think so.  She doesn't pay for anything.  Her parents did.  She doesn't even live with them anymore and they still pay her bills, including but not limited to; auto loan, hair extensions, clothes, rent, food, etc.

Did I mention she's from Park City?  This might explain a little more for you

  So the morale of this long tangent is that trust fund kids and spoiled "My parents are rich, I hate life!  I'm going to slit my wrists and do drugs..." kind of people need to fall down some stairs immediately.  No passing go, no $200 collection.  Spend a week in my shoes and find out just how hard it is to actually earn your own money and pay your own bills!

  Ok, so some of you may actually have jobs.  But because your parents are LOADED, you don't pay your own bills.  This is way you suck.  You are the reason America is will become just how it is depicted in the movie "Idiocracy".  I'm sick of you, you need to die.  Or cut the umbilical cord.  Your choice but grow up and make a living for yourself if you're choosing the latter...

Brought to you by The Smoke House where "We Sell For Less"

Smarter than the average smartphone

  First, let me preface with how this topic came about.  You would call me a geek/nerd, anything that involves being smart because I take Android smartphones and make them run faster and more reliable.  At first, I limited myself to only the phones that I owned.  Then some of my friends decided they liked the way my phone ran better than theirs so they wanted me to do the same to their phone. Let me say, that was kinda sorta a mistake.

  Let me also point out that this topic (like all others I post), does NOT pertain to one individual.  Some people believe that the world revolves around their asshole.  Well not around here.  I'm an equal opportunist, thus I believe that everyone is equal when it come to venting about people.  End of digression...

  So we pan to the present.   I have modded/hacked... whatever you wanna call it, around 15 phones (3 of them are mine).  The one thing that I cant get over is the fact that the people who ask me to ...mod their phones just aren't smart enough to even comprehend what it is that their phone is now capable of, much less operate it any better then they did before I got me hands on it. But this is not the problem.  What is the problem? 

  If you don't even know how to download the Facebook application (which is why it comes pre-installed now) then you really have no buisness touching a smartphone.  

  Look, I get it.  Smartphones are cool and the new thing.  Everybody wants a smartphone.  But, if you lack the intelligence to operate one, you should probably stick with the feature phones or commit blasphemy and acquire yourself an iPhone.

  So here's what I propose.  Since humanity will never learn nor get smart enough, there needs to be  some type of ... Smartphone 101 crash couse one could take to better their knowledge on operating said smartphone.  I mean, if you're gonna own one, better know how to use it.

  It's just like when cell phones first came out and your buddy wouldn't answer.  "What's the point of having a cell phone if you don't answer it?"  I modify that comment for this topic.

  "What's the point of owning a Smartphone if you're not smart enough to use it?"

The Daily Ha-Rumph brought to you by the Taco Bell in Sugarhouse

   

What is The Daily Ha-Rumph?

The Daily Ha-Rumph was created on accident due to yours truly complaining every day about something or another on facebook.  Not sure if you're aware, but it's pretty hard to type your thoughts out on a facebook status window.  It's kinda like Twitter, you only get so much space before you can't type anymore.  

So I decided that The Daily Ha-Rumph needs its own home.  So welcome to the home of complaints and venting.  I hope you enjoy your visit.  And please, feel free to leave feedback if you feel the need to.  If a discussion needs to be had, let's have it here!

Too good for the only option

 So many people keep turning jobs down left and right cause they feel their better than the job. NEWS FLASH! In this time of history, YOU'RE NOT!

I lost my job over a decision I made to help a friend out. I will still try to find something I don't over qualify for but eventually, I know I must swallow my pride and work fast food cause that will be my only option. Some people just need to stop acting so selfish. Especially the one's who have other mouths to feed. You were givin an opportunity to be employed. Ya, so it's not something you want to do, but it SUPPORTS YOU AND YOURS! Isn't that all that matters right now?

Instead of wasting time looking for something that won't give, how about you accept what will? Life's too short to waste time. The bright side is having more work experience to allow yourself to move somewhere you do want to be. Some of you can't pay your rent right now. Well that's a choice YOU made. You had the option to pay your rent but you turned it down because you don't want to be there. TOUGH SHIT! Grow up and support yourself!!

The daily Ha-rumph brought to you by your local McDonalds!